to yee yen

Yee Yen reads our blog. So I hope she read this.

Yee Yen is in a new ward, and has to be on-call every alternate day. I can see she is exhausted every time she comes back home. Her eye brows are always frowning every time I see her. Yesterday night, I knocked her room's door, because both door-way in to the toilet are locked. She opens the door and see me. She's frowning and looks at me as if she's going to scold me. Anyway, she say nothing when I come in. I told her both door were locked, that's why I knocked.

I am very scared of her, to even talk to her. I won't dared to speak to her more than one sentence.

I know that her mental health is not in a good shape now, due to her long hour and exhausting work. I'd like to talk to her to help her release her stress, because Yee Yen doesn't talk much now a days. I think she's suppressing her stress. If she talks, she will throw out her anger and stress in full force. That's why she keeps quiet.

Yee Yen always tell people to work to the hardest, she hates people who doesn't. And she's the kind of person who had peak mood, she's either very happy or very sad. I hope she learns a better way to channel her stress, because she should know, people are worried about her.

Yee Yen said she expect her children to work as hard as her. Imagine this is Yee Yen's child writing in the future, this will break a mother's heart.

talking dharma in music

i've been thinking of some thing to blog, inspirations to blog. But felt lazy until this second.

Anyway,

I'm in a holiday from school now a days, so my focus is on the music. So, every Wednesday and Saturday is my violin day, which is nutrition to my brain and soul every week. I'm trying best to know more about violin these days, for my exam and also for teaching lessons.

For my own lesson, I tried to absorb as much from my teacher every week. I'm practicing everyday now so I'm consistently keeping track of my progress. I think my teacher is very good, and very inspiring. I have high respect for him, as if what he says is a bible or something, hehe. Really do hope I can become a master of violin some day, to play violin like it's a part of my body. And of course, to get distinction, to get a diploma. Honestly, I am not sure if I can do all those, but I set them as my goal.

From my teaching, I'm doing research on exam syllabus, exam gradings, ways to repair a violin bow. I have a boy, Christopher, whose taking theory Grade 1 next month. I am giving him past year sheets to do every week. Marking it is a new thing for him, and I have to browse books to find him the best appropriate answer. Teaching gives me a lot of exposure to new things, a lot of 'first times', and I felt motivated by them. I'm planning to study theory until grade 7 or 8 just so I can teach theory like most piano teachers, later in this line. As I was browsing ABRSM website for info, I saw a page offering teaching course. It cost 200+ paun. (UK money, or is it spelled correctly?) I felt interested. I am seeking more to help my student now. Other than my teacher , colleague and the internet, my input for solutions are limited. By thinking all this, I felt more of teaching music as my main job in the future, rather than working as a designer. Which I don't feel odd. I've asked 2 music teachers, they did not have higher education in music.

Learning music is nothing like studying academic stuff, every level-up is a challenge to overcome from our selves, which is way more difficult. My mind is now in a state of enjoying, and at the same time, thinking seriously about music. And now I realize, I'm yet again in another level now.